To My Friends…

Hello friends!  So here are some things I’ve been wanting to say and haven’t had the time to put into words.  This is everything a parent of young kids would like to say to their friends.  But for my own friends – this is for you.  And most importantly – thanks – because you are awesome, and I don’t say that enough.

To My Friends…

1. To my single friends

Live life.  Work hard.  And tell me about it because for now I’m experiencing these things vicariously through you.  I know I am busy and my phone calls are short and visits almost non-existent, but yes…that dress looks perfect on you, that is an AWESOME wedding idea, and if you are having a really bad day I truly hope it gets better.  Please know that if I cut our conversation short or seem distracted, it isn’t because I want that to happen, but only because my mind is in a million directions at once and there is probably throw-up in my hair.  And thanks for that smile when I mention yet another poo diaper or that cool thing that my kid just said for the first time or all my dilemmas about birthday parties and photo ops.

      2. To my friends without kids

Life without kids seems like a different world to me even though it really wasn’t that long ago.  Know that I totally support your decision to not have kids.  I don’t think you are selfish or deprived or any less of a person.  Even though your life is different from mine, I know it is still hard sometimes.  Your friendship is still important to me, and I wish more than anything that I had the time to dedicate to be there for you the same way you have always been there for me.  I can’t wait for our next visit – even if it’s just a few minutes for lunch.  Contrary to what people may think, I actually like my kids.  I want to spend time with you sooo badly, but when I leave my kids it makes me a little sad that I won’t get to read them a book or give their sticky faces a good-night kiss.  Being a mom is the hardest job I have ever had, but oddly enough I love it anyway.  I’m not saying this to make you feel guilty – but the opposite.  If I have managed to get away to spend some time with you it is because you mean the world to me.  You are important.  And thank you for being patient!

3. To my friends who want kids

It is awesome.  amazing.  exhausting.  draining.  And every other word you have been told a million times.  You are going to be awesome at it. Also, you can practice on my kids anytime.

To those of you who want nothing more than to be a parent but for some reason haven’t been able to, I feel for you.  Know that I’m always thinking about you – praying and hoping.  When I complain about that throw-up in my hair from earlier, I remember you.  I wish I could fix it, and I know the “everything happens for a reason” saying you have probably heard a million times doesn’t mean that it doesn’t suck. Thank you for still smiling when I tell you about my baby’s first tooth or first haircut.  You would totally win parenting, and I hope a baby boy or girl gets to call you mommy and daddy one day.  Know that when you are crying, so am I.

4. To my friends with kids

That time you came all the way to Florida for my bachelorette party weekend and left your kids at home?  I get it now.  It just seemed like a good ole time then, but wow, do I get it now.  Thank you a million times.  I now know what it takes to leave your kids home – monetarily, emotionally, organizationally, and you did that for me – many many times.  If you can’t always call me back or spend more than a few minutes talking, that’s okay.  Thank you for answering all my questions about what the heck I am supposed to do when x, y, or z happens.  Thanks for not judging me and my parenting style, but still giving me tips and suggestions in a super awesome way that always makes me feel comfortable coming to you with questions.  Also, thanks for answering the middle of the night calls and looking at the super gross pictures when I am asking you wth I am supposed to be doing.  I hope I can one day be as supportive of my group number 3 friends the same way you have been there for me.  Know that I admire you, look to you with awe, and secretly jot down all of your parenting tricks in my mind when I come visit.  Also thanks to your kids for being role models for mine.  Thanks to them for spending time helping my kids to grow and learn what it is like to have a friendship.  You have taught them that, and I will be forever grateful.

5. To my husband

To my husband – the man I am still in awe of and who still amazes me every day.  Thanks for putting up with me when I am cranky and still have that throw-up in my hair.  Thanks for keeping me grounded and not being afraid to tell me when there is something you don’t agree with – and thanks for still kissing me afterwards even if I sound whiny.  Thanks for working crazy long hours and still changing poo diapers.  Thanks for being our kids’ best friend and also their best teacher.  I know for a fact that I couldn’t do this without you (so…also thanks for wearing your seatbelt).  Basically, thanks for being so awesome.  PS.  Let’s have a date night.

6. To my parents

Wow.  I don’t even know where to start with this one.  You made me the person I am and have been there for me my entire life.  You are the reason I have kids of my own and feel fairly confident that I am doing an okay job.  You take time out of your own busy schedules to help me with mine, and that doesn’t go unnoticed.  You give me a place to stay when we are in between houses, a place to go when we are hungry and tired, and a wealth of knowledge when I have a million questions about adulting and raising kids.  You are my parents, but also my friends, and I hope I can do the same for my kids one day.  My kids love you, and thanks for giving them a place to go so I can go on that occasional night out without having a panic attack!  There is no way for me to pay you back for everything you have done, but you once told me that the only payback you need is for me to one day do the same things for my kids that you did for me.  I heard you and I remembered and I’m trying, and I have some very big shoes to fill.

7. To my coworkers

Thanks for giving me the day off that time my kid had a fever.  Also, thanks for telling me about that throw-up in the hair before the meeting – that was pretty awesome.  And also, thanks for listening when I have kids on the mind and am learning to juggle the whole working parent thing.

8. To my kids’ teachers

Thankfully I have awesome group number 7s, but I still have to go (and actually enjoy going) to work.  In the rush to drop off kids and skid my carseat studded SUV into my work parking space sometimes I don’t get the chance to really talk to you – and you spend nearly as much time with my kids as I do.  I realize you have lives and troubles, and kids and grandkids of your own, but you still take the time to be there for my kids and put all those things behind you for the day.  You give them a stable place to learn to be a better version of themselves.  I see your influence when they come home singing a new song and telling me amazing things that I know I never taught them myself.  I see the love they have for you when they want to give you hugs and talk about you at home.  They will be better people because of you.

9. To my bonus kid(s)

I know your life got turned upside down when you suddenly had a bunch of new little babies running around.  Just know that they will always look up to you, and I will always appreciate how much time and love you give them.  You didn’t ask for this, and yet you embrace it and show them nothing but tenderness and care.  You will always be important to me, and I am so proud of the young adult you are becoming.  Not only are you an inspiration for your siblings, but also an inspiration for me.  Just because you are young doesn’t mean you can’t influence the people around you – thank you for making me a better person.

10. To my actual kids

Sooooo you are the creator of the throw-up probably still in my hair and also the inspiration for this blog post.  I’m hoping you get that potty thing figured out and one day become president.  But if you don’t win the presidency it’s still cool.  Pro sports are a good way to go also.  I’m partial to baseball – just sayin.  Thanks for the snuggles and “uga mugas” and smiles and laughs – I know they will be gone too soon.  Today I’m your parent, but one day you will be my friend just like my parents are now my friends.  I love being there for you even when I’m exhausted, and one day you will pay me back – by doing all these same things for your kids (or friends if you fall into the number 2 friend group).  And guess what?  I love you 😉